Today's stepping stone (journal entry)
So today was another stepping stone. Not one I’m thrilled with, but it’s a need. Therapy. I’ve been through the process before. This is my second time at UCBH. I’m not quite comfortable talking about my problems with a stranger. But since I have an actual goal now, I’m hoping that this time around will be helpful. By now you should know that my main goal is to find ways to help with my stress/anger management. Also I would like to work on my agoraphobia. I think that is where by social stress comes from. Perhaps that should be my primary goal with therapy. I’m still unsure about it all. The next appointment is when the actual therapy starts (today was paper work day).
Like I said, I’ve done this before. My first experience was actually pretty good. I think I just got lucky, and got an awesome psychiatrist. I was at the same place for a long time, then came across some insurance problems. It was a while, about three years give or take, before I went to therapy again. My therapist was okay. It was me that stopped it then. I just couldn’t think of anything to talk about. Personally, I think the main issue was that I didn’t exactly have a goal. So my brain just got stuck on buffer mode, and things just didn’t add up enough to help. This time around, there’s a clear intent. So hopefully this will be it for me. Cross your fingers for me!
One of my main goals (that of which I made for myself when I left the hospital) was this blog!! I think I’ve done a decent job keeping up with it. I don’t know, you’ll have to tell me.
Another goal was to go to the gym more regularly. That one hasn’t really been started yet. But I do have the membership, so that’s a good step forward. I just have to push myself to actually do it. Soooooo, I guess that will be my next step. It would help if I had some cheerleaders to help motivate me (hint hint).
All in all, progress is slow but steady. I’m very happy to have you all here to support me, and hopefully grow with me. Let’s not forget our mantra: “I am willing to change and grow!!”
Thank you all for everything! Until next time, Namaste!